It just didn’t turn out to be the fairy tale I had so badly hoped for.

I'm sure most of us have heard something about the recent reality star divorce that has been all over media sources in the past few days. I couldn't help but notice this very sad, destructive statement that was made in her blog.

"It just didn’t turn out to be the fairy tale I had so badly hoped for."

Since when did anyone ever say marriage is a fairy tale? Lets take some time to look into some of these iconic fairy tale princesses and examine where the misconception takes place.

Cinderella. She lost her mother and then her father. 2 losses that no child should have to experience at such a young age. She then endured emotional and verbal abuse from her step mother and step sisters. She endured adversity in many different arenas. She lost the freedom to feel safe, welcome and a sense of ownership in her home. Her friends consisted of animals and rodents. Everything she had of value was stripped away by her step mother and sisters. She met a Prince who fell in love with her & they were married.

Snow White. Was born the her mother, a queen who died shortly after she was born. Her father remarried a vain woman who didn't like that Snow White was fairer than she was. She is sent by her step mother into the woods to be killed by a hunter. The hunter shows mercy to her and sends her away to live in the woods in a small cottage with 7 little guys that worked all day. She earns her stay in the cottage by keeping house for the dwarfs, cooking, making beds, laundry, sewing, and knitting, and keeping everything clean and orderly. She endures 3 more attempts of murder from her step mother before meeting her prince.

Belle (Beauty and the Beast) Bell also lost her mother and lives solely with her father. Is courted by a miserably mean and disrespectful man. She lives very humbly with her father who is struggling to provide. In order to spare her father, she must give up everything she owns to live with the Beast. During her stay with the beast it takes her a good while to warm up to him and become his friend, and then fall in love. She nearly has Beast stolen away from her by her horrible ex before she achieves her happily ever after.

I think we can all see a pattern here, I could continue if I wanted but for the sake of space I'll just get to the point. These fairy tales we are raised to fantasize about as young girls are deceiving. No one acknowledges all the struggles and loss that the princesses had to endure to achieve their fairy tales. They put in time, trials, hard work, sweat and tears before they got to the good stuff. This is the same in marriage. It it always a work in progress. As a wife, living according to the word of God, you experience loss in a marriage too. You have to put aside yourself, put God first and then your husband. We're suppose to be selfless and submit to our husbands as the leaders of our households. We have to work, clean, serve (sometimes when we don't want to). We have fights and trials but it's all these things that create in us the character to be a perfect partner for our spouse. Jesus endured struggles, resistance, and death before he got his fairy tale too. Much pain = much reward. The idea that marriage is instant gratification is completely unrealistic. Women who reach their happily ever after put it time and were dedicated to fighting for their relationship.


So to the newly weds, stay encouraged and endure until the end. The reward is worth the fight.
To the moderately experience Princess in the making. Thank you for sticking in there so far. Be encouraged and keep your eye on the prize.
To all those Princesses out there who have achieved their Happily Ever After. I look forward to the day when I am where you are. I admire your willingness to be devoted to Christ and the covenant that you and your husband created with him. Please share with us your fairy tale.